Breathe Without You
by PurpleProbie22
Summary: During the ending of iLove You. Oneshot, songfic to Taylor Swift's "Breathe".


Disclaimer: I sadly do not own iCarly.

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><p>"… <em>just, be friends or something. But, stop pretending you can be boyfriend-and-girlfriend when you both know that it's just weird and wrong…"<em>

Those words stung both Freddie and Sam's chest very badly. They both knew that Carly wasn't practically talking about them, but… still. She was right. They couldn't keep pretending they can be boyfriend and girlfriend. It was just too weird and wrong.

So they returned to the stairs and went up to the iCarly studio.

Silence approached the two teens as they walked into the elevator. She hit the "close" button and the door slowly slid down. Suddenly, she stopped the elevator by pushing the "emergency" button.

They both sighed, and she began talking.

"So… "

"She wasn't talking about us."

She slightly nodded, "I know, but… you think… maybe… you and I are taking some connection we have… and…"

"… trying to force it into a boyfriend-gilrfriend thing?" he offered.

She nodded, "Yeah."

"Why… I mean, I don't know," he chuckled, "it's like, after all the years of us being, like, at each other's throats…" he took a breath, "and you… kissed me… that night at school. It was pretty… intense."

He turned his head to look at her while she snorted, "Hey, you put me in a mental hospital." She leaned against the wall, trying to ignore the fact that her heart had just dropped. "So, that kiss was just intense?"

He nodded and smirked, "And fun."

She smiled. "Yeah… I just…" she shrugged, "I dunno if you and me really clicked… that way." They looked at each other, trying to read each other's expression, trying to read each other's minds…

_**I see your face in my mind as I drive away**_

'_**Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way**_

"Yeah," he nodded and shrugged, "but… you know, maybe one day if you get a little more normal…"

"Or you get a little more abnormal." She leaned back on the wall.

_**People are pople and sometimes we change our minds**_

_**But it's killing me to see you go after all this time**_

"So… did we just break up?" she tried not to cry to say the break-up word.

He looked up at the elevator's ceiling, "Feels like it," he said softly.

_**Music starts playin' like the end of a sad movie**_

_**It's the kind of ending you don't really wanna see**_

He turned his head again to face the blonde who was nodding, "But it was mutual, right?"

"Well, yeah. But I'm still gonna tell people that I dumped your butt and broke your nerdy lil' heart."

'_**Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down**_

He smirked, "Fair enough."

She sighed, "Oh well." She pushed the button so the elevator started going down again.

_**Now I don't know what to be without you around**_

The small space was once again filled with another silence. Both their faces looked disappointed and sad—even Sam's face, as if they never wanted to break up in the first place.

_**Never wanted this, never wanna see you hurt**_

_**Every little bump in the road I'd try to swerve**_

He swore that he could see the tears that began forming in her eyes. He didn't wanna see her hurt. All he wanted to do was just hug her and tell her that he didn't wanna lose her. He'd do every thing to make her feel alright. He'd do anything to make the pain go away.

_**People are people and sometimes it doesn't work out**_

The elevator stopped and the door slid open. She glanced at Freddie before walking out of the elevator. He looked like he wanted to say something, but he wasn't brave enough. So she just stepped out of the elevator.

But his voice stopped her.

"I love you."

She immediately stopped and raised her eyebrows, as if she wondered if he did mean it. He did actually mean it. She turned around, her voice started cracking at the end of the sentence as she spoke/whispered…

"I love you too."

_**Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out**_

But they both knew that even though those words came from their deepest heart, it wouldn't change a thing. They weren't meant to be in love this way. They couldn't stay in this kind of a relationship, they both realized that.

But he still smiled, and she tried the hardest she could to hold back the tears. Not knowing what to do, she just walked towards him and rested her hands on his shoulder, and then kissed him. He kissed back, and put his hands on her waist. The kiss was short and sweet but meaningful. Love, they swore that it was love. But their love wasn't easy… so they couldn't stay like this…

_**And we know it's never simple, never easy**_

_**Never a clean break, no one's here to save me**_

He took his phone, glancing at the clock. "It's only like ten-thirty…"

"Wanna break up at midnight?"

"That works."

And then they got back to the elevator, hitting the button and began making out as the door slid down.

They still had an hour and a half to spend together. They weren't gonna waste it.

She would remember the way he kissed her, the way he rested his hands on her waist, the way he slipped his tongue inside her mouth. She might not have another chance to have his lips against hers anymore, so she would enjoy their last kiss (or their last make-out) this time.

He would remember the way she kissed her back, the way she put her hands on his shoulder and slid them until her hands finally rested around his neck. He would never forget how her lips tasted, soft, sweet, and a slight taste of ham that would last on his lips. He might not have another chance to have her in his arms anymore, so he would enjoy their last kiss (or their last make-out) this time.

_**You're the only thing I know, like the back of my hand…**_

Time flies so fast while you're having fun. That is correct.

They didn't realize that it was past midnight already—it was even almost 2 a.m, wow, they sure spent a lot of time making out in the elevator. And when they finally realized, they both pulled apart, ending their last kiss hesitantly. It didn't feel right to let their lips apart. They didn't wanna end this, but they should. Because they couldn't be together _that_ way…

She slowly took a step back and sighed. He also sighed as he slowly pulled his hands off of his waist. They stood there in another awkward silence until she pressed the same button that made the elevator start going down.

The elevator stopped on the eighth floor, Shay's living room. They both walked outside the elevator, still surrounded by silence. The room was really quiet, so they both guessed that Carly and Spencer were probably already asleep.

He opened the front door. "So, see you next time, I guess."

"Yeah," she smiled."

"Good night."

"Good night," she repeated awkwardly.

He half-smiled and closed the door slowly, but she suddenly put her foot between the door and the frame door so he couldn't close it.

"Thank you. For tonight."

He chuckled lightly, "You're welcome, Sam."

And then she moved her foot so he could close the door. She still stood there a few moment after the door closed, and then she took off her jacket and her hideous platform shoes (that she wore only because she wanted to kiss Freddie easier). She laid on the couch and tried to sleep, but she couldn't.

She just stared at the ceiling with a blank expression on her face. She felt so empty. She just lost him, and it felt worse than she ever thought.

_**It's two a.m, feelin' like I just lost a friend**_

_**Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me**_

Meanwhile, the boy was trying to sleep on his bed, but his eyes wouldn't shut. He felt like one of his teeth was being pulled. He felt hurt and empty. He wanted her, and he just lost her.

_**I can't breathe without you**_

_**But I have to breathe without you**_

_**But I have to…**_

There was nothing they could do. It would be hard, but they would try to move on and let go. No matter how painful it was to live without each other as boyfriend and girlfriend, they would try. Because they weren't right for each other.

_**I'm sorry… because I couldn't be the best girlfriend for you…**_

_I'm sorry… because I couldn't be the right boyfriend for you…_

_**I'm sorry… because I never really tried to understand you…**_

_I'm sorry… because I couldn't fully understand you…_

_**I'm sorry… because I was being so aggressive…**_

_I'm sorry… because I couldn't be what you always wanted me to be…_

_**I'm sorry, because we had to end this relationship…**_

A few moments later, they finally could shut their eyes and drifted off to sleep. And now they know, no matter which path they had chosen to go, it was probably the best way for them. Even if they had to breathe without each other.

And with that, he could only wish that her life would be better without him.

And with that, she could only wish that he would find someone better than her.

For now, being friends was enough for them. They hoped.

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><p><strong>AN: I know, i know. This story is kinda pointless but i still need to write some more about iLove You before continuing the other fics. I apologize for any mistakes out there. Didn't recheck it, as usual. Probably will check it tomorrow, now i'm already sleepy and tired.**

**Reviews are like love. So, reviews! Give mama some suggestions and critics, but no flames please!**

**xx**


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